Solo Confidence

The little boat,
Drifts along,
In its heart,
Beats a psycho song,
Full of anger,
Full of angst,
Mad then sad,
It goes far beyond bad.

The song appears,
To come and go,
Caused by whatever weather,
Has determined,
The river’s flow,
But from the banks,
We never know,
To what extent,
It’s taken its toll.

Look it over closely,
Before taking the little boat,
Out for a drive,
Look every day,
In case a storm showed up,
And riled its waters,
While you were elsewhere,
And it needs a repair.

You can’t know for sure,
At only a glance,
So why take the chance?
From where you’re at,
There’s no telling,
If winds were blowing,
Making holes that aren’t showing,
But will be made known,
After you’ve taken it,
Away from its home.

You must remember,
The storm has no friends,
It tosses every boat,
In its path,
And some are made,
To resist its wrath,
But some just can’t withstand,
A strong storm’s demands.

Though it’s controversial,
Technically,
Boats are optional,
And it’s more than acceptable,
To let that boat,
Be for someone else to float.

Though the river is mandatory,
How one navigates it,
Is their own little story,
A boat is escapable,
If you’re capable.

All Cut Up

Intensely felt,
Gashed down deep,
But unable to bleed,
Caused by a thing,
It feels like from which,
There’s no being freed.

It’s immense,
Needing stitches,
Though it won’t be sewn shut,
The best of soothing salves,
Can’t begin to mend the halves.

Weighted down,
By something not seen just felt,
Nearing now to the bottom,
Not quite but almost drowned.

Invisible,
But so powerful,
Easy to forget it isn’t obvious,
Since it’s gathered you such an audience.

Uncomfortable,
As a broken bone,
It assures,
You never feel at home,
Though you know it’s just in your mind,
And indeed,
You’re in reality just fine.

It seems fake,
Compared with headaches or toothaches,
You’ll be told to suck it up,
And made to feel like a fuck-up.

All too common,
Because society is rotten,
Sick in the head,
Is what will be said,
An insult,
That will make you see red.

Never talking of emotions,
Always leads up to explosion,
Tragic though,
That you must choose between,
Being wrecked,
Or causing some bullshit commotion.

Angels Await

**********

Super short,
Oh so fucking beautiful,
At times full of shit,
This accurately describes,
Each of them,
But even now,
I’ve a love for them,
That will never quit.

**********

Beyond the clouds,
These two wait for me,
And right now,
I look up from below,
Wishing that I too could go.

About now they’re walking,
Streets of gold,
Called names like Glory Road,
And Hallelujah Boulevard,
Pretty as any picture,
On a Pacific Island postcard.

I wonder what they do,
Now that trouble,
Isn’t able to be gotten into?
Because they’re Earthly behavior,
I’m sure isn’t tolerated,
By any Angels or the Savior.

I sure hope the boy is over his fear,
And lets the pony near,
Because together,
Is always so much better.

Truth be told,
They may be better off,
Up there as they trod down,
Golden roads,
Time will pass,
But they will stay as they are,
Never growing old.

Most call retirement,
The best years of their lives,
But I don’t return that sentiment,
As the years after being laid,
Into graves,
Is the only time we’re thoroughly released,
From being this world’s slaves.

Of course I wish for them back,
That cannot be helped,
But when it’s making me feel down,
I imagine them there,
Wearing their jeweled crowns,
And gone from their faces,
Are those ever-present frowns,
They seemed too frequently to wear,
When they lived with me here.

**********

I guess it’s a giant place,
With plenty to see and do,
But still I’ll be insulted,
If I find when it’s my time,
That they never looked back down,
Glancing out beyond space,
For a reassuring glimpse of my face.

**********

Huh

Is it worth it?
Time will tell,
If it’s the path to peace,
Or another highway to hell.

Similar situations,
Always cause such irritations,
But it takes a leap of faith,
To sort through the rakes,
And since someone must do it,
Here I go,
Sorting through it.

Funny how,
A split-second decision,
Made in the here and now,
Can either complete your vision,
Or cause in your life,
A major collision.

Unfortunate how,
You cannot know,
Until riches flow,
Or you’re dealt the blow.

Last I checked,
Hindsight is supposed to be perfect,
They call it twenty-twenty,
But would foresight really be disastrous?
Or also fucking fantastic?

How horrendous,
The former always shows its face,
Way too fucking late,
And the latter only exists,
For those with special gifts.

**********

Something to think about,
As you wear yourself out,
Waiting, waiting, waiting,
To see what’s the ending:
Is that your faith that’s bending?
In turn making your mind,
Do some overextending?

**********

The Fate Of The Attractive

It’s constant paranoia,
And makes a mind miserable,
Can cause gaps not bridgeable,
It’s in a way terrible,
Really,
Being so pretty.

And that’s not snobbery,
It’s pure and simple fact,
Brought to light by comments,
And the way total strangers react.

You can’t begin,
To imagine the bullshit,
Take as example,
The way other humans,
Will lie or throw a fit,
Without reason,
Just to take your name and trample it.

Personality plain and simple,
This lady once,
Was brought up by peoples,
Stuffed to the gills with oppressions,
And the results are this,
Her unsurpassed beauty,
Brings on sporadic depressions.

It sure would be good,
Going for something to eat,
Without being looked at,
As though she was the meat,
By someone she doesn’t even,
Ever want to meet.

Let’s see,
If this can be worded correctly,
To make you know,
All strangers are suspect,
Because her mind,
She must protect.

With a friendly shoulder touch,
She didn’t want to,
But smiled and said hi,
To the odd individual,
Day in and day out,
She ignores the looks he gives,
Because she finds him pitiful,
And knows he just wants her,
To lay claim on the one they all call beautiful.

This is daily dealings,
Trying not to hurt too many feelings,
Hers must stay on mute,
Lest she be labeled as trouble, drama, and problem,
Eventually,
For sanity’s sake,
She’s desperate to get a break,
All this acting cute,
To those whose balls deserve a heavy boot,
It sickens her,
And she’s not sure,
How much longer it can occur.

Done,
Just so fucking done,
She refuses to fight an uncalled-for battle,
That shouldn’t need to be won,
So she will withdraw,
And stick with those,
Who walk on hooves and paws.

Welcome To The Real World

Too good to be true?
Yes I think,
Maybe that describes you,
About to admit to happy,
Then I feel it,
Fly right past me.

Is it worth the hell?
Time will tell,
Overnight elated,
Then lightning fast deflated.

Electricity,
Pouring into and out of me,
Not too long,
And it bordered on too strong.

Good,
But always shy of good enough,
Luckily,
I’m made of fucking tough stuff.

Nothing special,
So I’ll wrestle,
To get past this devil,
So I don’t go mental.

We’re all the same,
It’s only a game,
I know all are scum,
We’ll have to see if one,
Is better than some……….

No One Is Silver, And That One Is Definitely Not Gold

**********

I hear I’m such trash,
I hear I’m a crazy,
I hear I’m an idiot,
But I hear it all,
From a bigot who’s lazy.

**********

It’s time to cut ties,
With all the lies,
Snip it off,
At the root,
Give their ass the boot.

Playing both sides,
Walking a fine fine line,
Always promising to be there,
Pretending to care,
Until it’s time,
To face reality,
Then their face,
You’ll never see.

Going nowhere fast,
And wanting to drag you down,
With their sorry ass,
Keep your focus forward,
No need for glances back,
Those kinds of minds,
Aren’t strong enough to attack.

Facts are facts,
And truth is truth,
It’s not your imagination,
Though they’ll tell you otherwise,
To cover up those lies,
Listen to your inner man,
When you feel him prod you on,
To a different destination.

Hear their silence,
No peace in its presence,
The meaning is demeaning,
Or sometimes malicious.

In proximity,
But just out of reach,
Assuming you’ll save the day,
You’re kept around,
For when desperate times,
Call for desperate measures,
Then in a flash,
Your name is preached,
And they’re stuck like a leech.

Together and caught off guard,
In a battle with bloodshed,
You’d be the one dead,
They’d never give cover,
If you had a bead on your head.

Weak links,
Who fall apart under pressure,
I see them like poor abused dogs,
Beaten and caged,
But deathly afraid,
Thinking without bowing down,
They will starve and drown,
In truth,
They’re even worse off,
Because something they lack,
Is courage to bite back.

**********

I hear I’m such trash,
I hear I’m a crazy,
I hear I’m an idiot,
But I hear it all,
From a bigot who’s lazy.

**********

Two Fourteen

This thing,
“Valentine’s Day”,
It reminds me of those church people,
Who only remember,
On Christmas and Easter,
Who is King and Master.

It does not matter,
What they say,
It’s just stupid,
And it’s always been that way,
It does not matter,
What is said,
If it makes you that excited,
You are fucked in the head.

A heart worth snagging,
Will never be impressed,
By heart shaped boxes,
Maybe I miss my guess,
But if that’s all it takes,
For a fucking yes,
You haven’t won a thing,
Worth all that bragging.

Mr. Fancy Pants,
Is taking her,
To the dinner dance,
How very predictable,
But the rest of the year,
You know they’re miserable.

Making time,
By skipping work,
As if he’s not,
Usually a jerk,
As an added touch,
He’s picked up cheesy flowers,
Knowing it’ll amp up his advantage,
That when you’re out on the town,
You will let your guard down,
Mentally sign yourself up,
Together for another year,
Bound to be,
An even deeper disaster.

Bears and candies,
Line the bar,
When you wake up,
And head for coffee,
In your jammies,
This is supposed to make right,
Every time there’s been a fight,
Please don’t fall for it,
Another fucking year of bullshit.

**********

It’s not the life for me,
I prefer to be free,
You may call it lonely,
But I say,
It sure as shit,
Beats your misery.

**********

I Could Never

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Broken and cold,
And forever alone.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Shackled to your past,
So much a bleak future,
Carved in stone is forecast.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Closed off and cruel,
A stubborn old mule.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Dark and bitter,
Boring,
Without glamour and glitter.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Day after day,
Overworked with no play.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Full of judgement and gossip,
Deserving of a sturdy wallop.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Unfaithful and not reliable,
But unfortunately buyable.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
The cause of someone else’s sorrow,
Just because you don’t care,
What happens to you tomorrow.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
A wishy-washy wallflower,
Who suppresses your own power.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Devoid of faith,
And ignoring fate.

May you never let yourself,
Become like them,
Afraid to go after,
The things that bring you,
Joy and laughter.

No Help For It

It’s my favorite,
And I don’t want to get over it,
Though it seems the worst choice to make,
It’s my favorite,
And I don’t want to let go of it.

I’ll confess it doesn’t seem,
Like a prime pick,
And why just any won’t due,
I’ve no clue,
But this one for some reason,
I think would fit like,
A perfectly-broken-in shoe.

As they’re pretty much alike,
That one should be able to,
Just take a hike,
But it’s like I’d like to connect a cable,
Because when I’ve got it around,
I feel slightly more stable.

Such a terrible old thing,
And gives an awful sting,
When it lashes out like lightning,
But still I find,
It makes my life exciting.

Maybe it’s just an addiction,
If so,
That’s one super strong poison,
Even so,
Bring me a big cup,
And I’ll drink it right up.

It deserves a good kick,
But still,
I hope it stands unmoved,
When it gets this reprove,
Since when it’s around,
My life feels improved.

I bet it’s bad to be around,
It’s always pulsing out vicious vibes,
Like an agressive animal,
It may as well bare teeth,
And lunge at feet.

There’s a simultaneous urge,
To push it away,
And pull it closer,
The emotions that surge,
My mind is like a rollercoaster,
Whether from me it’s near or far.

The sight of it,
Has my stomach in knots,
I’m wishing it would just get lost,
But then I’m loving it.

Persistent as a tooth gone rotten,
It just will not be forgotten,
This sunshine might be lost,
But I’ll seek it out,
At any cost.